I grew up in Birmingham Alabama in the 1970s and 1980s. Fun fact – I know what an eight-track tape is and remember when they were state of the art technology. As a child of the 70s I love funk music, and was more interested in listening to music than picking up a book. However, my mother was a true believer and proponent of reading. She was very well read and insisted that her daughters follow her example.
In those early days of childhood, I also loved entertaining people with my impersonations of my favorite television characters and singers, and was not above clowning. My Mother would chastise me by saying that the folks on TV get paid to act a fool. She believed that Black folks were being portrayed negatively, and vehemently disliked anything that resembled buffoonery. My mother fully intended that I would be poised, dignified, and graceful, and to her credit, I am. Consequently, I consider myself to be an introvert by parental design; so much so that it feels innate now.
Under my mother’s guidance I cater to intellectual interests and pastimes to the exclusion of exhibition. I was an excellent student with a passion for learning which I continue to pursue. I prefer documentaries over reality TV and I read a lot. One thing that my usual activities have in common is that they are made for one, and have conditioned me to be a loner. It takes a lot of energy to go outside of myself to become a part of a group and participate in team activities.
I joined Toastmasters in part not necessarily to get back in touch with my inner-clown, but to become more comfortable with speaking publicly and sharing information about myself. Perhaps I will reconsider the clown label and call it my internal entertainer. I desire to be more fully myself which includes the more outgoing part which is still deep inside of me, and the self that I was shaped into becoming. By now, after reading my story thus far, you should understand that opening up personally is difficult for me, and speaking to a group of people to talk about myself is down-right scary. Thankfully, Toastmasters offered me a minimally threatening opportunity to give a speech about myself with what is called an “Ice Breaker.” According to the Project Description in The Toastmasters International Manual, the purpose of the Ice Breaker as the first speech project is to, “Introduce yourself to your fellow club members and give them some information about your background, interests and ambitions.”
In my first speech to my club, I shared that I am working toward balancing being a quiet loner with being able to comfortably interact and fully engage with other people. I am happy for the opportunity to achieve this goal through Toastmasters. I have given about ten speeches, participated in Table Topics at almost every meeting even prior to becoming a club member, and served in numerous speaking roles during club meetings. The more I practice – the more comfortable I become with public speaking, but remain a long way from actually enjoying sharing, and speaking to a large audience. Since this blog is about speaking, I am leaving you with a quotation by Dr. Mardy Grothe, “Words have incredible power. They can make people’s hearts soar, or they can make people’s hearts sore.”
Share your experience with opening up to speak with a new group of people, or making a public speech in the comment space below. Happy speaking everyone!
